Robert A. Chapski, Ltd. Divorce and family law attorneys serving Kane County and the surrounding areas
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Stressed about divorce? You're not alone

If there is anything in the world that can stress you out, it's having to end a relationship. You never liked breaking up with your partners in the past, and now that you're married, it's even harder to admit that you don't want to be with your spouse.

You've both talked about divorcing before, but nothing ever came from those discussions. Now, you've decided to make the first move and file the paperwork, but that doesn't come without stress. You don't want to see this situation become a major dispute. You don't want to be stressed out even more after you make this decision.

What can you do to make this an easier process?

One thing to do first is to talk to your attorney before you let your spouse know that you want to get a divorce. Once you tell your spouse you want a divorce, you may find that they are reluctant to help you access financial documents or to work with you in identifying assets. Instead, talk to your attorney so that you know what information you need to obtain before you file. That way, if your spouse changes passwords or is not willing to work with you, getting copies of important documents won't become a chore.

Another thing that you may want to do is to sit down and think through divorcing. Is it really what you want? Have you tried alternatives, such as marriage counseling? If you come to the conclusion that a divorce is truly best for everyone involved, then you should be able to move forward more confidently.

Finally, a third tip to make your divorce less stressful is to be willing to negotiate and listen to the other party. Yes, your marriage may be ending, but this doesn't have to be a war. You and your spouse can negotiate and talk through things like property division and child custody. Your divorce doesn't necessarily have to go to trial or be a major dispute. Many couples work together and come up with a settlement quickly, so that they are able to complete their divorce documents and move on with their lives.

No divorce is simple, and they're all complex in their own ways. Fortunately, there is good help and support available to you. If you work with your attorney, get the right documents before talking about divorce with your spouse and are willing to negotiate, then you may find that your divorce goes more smoothly than you expected.

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